Struggles of a wannabe English Major. (Lengthy)

[Hanna]

I guess I might just get this out of the way first. I'm not an English major, and not even close being one for a number of years. I'm actually just a high school student who one day, stumbled upon this site, and upon realizing what it was for, squealed like a fan-girl and have stuck with it ever since. In short, just really admire you guys. I hope that's okay.

All that aside, I have to admit that as much as I've enjoyed learning the subject throughout the past two years of my high school education, I'm starting to have some serious doubts about whether or not to pursue the subject as a major in college. For the most part I do wish to continue studying it beyond high school, (my passion for literature is proof enough), but there's this nagging fear in the back of my mind that I'll somehow fail to develop enough skill to succeed with it. I have no trouble comprehending the works that I read, it's just that when it comes to delving deeper into the meaning of the novels I almost always come up short. I can give you a plot summary of The Bell Jar, for example, but if you asked for an in-depth explanation of what the author's intent was, or to write a four page essay revolving around the themes of the story, I'd be at a loss. And although I do research to follow through with what I don't understand with the books I read, it makes me feel, I don't know...cheap? I just get really discouraged when I read literature and I don't fully grasp everything the author had to offer with it after I'm finished. It's like, geez, I'm sixteen and have been through years of Honors classes and I can't figure out what 1984 was trying to say to me without using a watered-down site like Sparknotes? I might just be being too hard on myself here, but I can't help how I feel about this.

Plus, I've been accepted for AP English for the next school year, and that's really got me on edge. Everyone who applied was required to write an essay that would determine whether you got in or not, and somehow I got accepted. I'm completely grateful for that fact of course, but my paper was a mess. Formal writing is not a strong point of mine by any stretch of the imagination. I've tried to get extra help with this from my English teachers over the past years with this issue and they ended up being either "too busy" or appeared so irritated with the fact that I even asked such a thing of them I just retreated to reading the notes they left in margins of my papers. Most of the marks were grammar corrections. So besides the fact that I need to pay closer attention to my spelling and punctuation, I don't have much else to go on. I've also heard that the AP classes for my school are independent (as in with minimal teacher assistance), and involve numerous essays, all of which are graded the similar to the way they would be in college. I'm looking forward to all the challenges, but seeing as I struggle enough with fully understanding literature on my own and can barely piece together a decent essay, I'm a little scared.

How should I go about preparing myself for all this? Are there websites or books out there that could possibly help?

[andreaisabbbw]

I was a lot like you when I was a freshman and going into my sophomore year of high school. I don't think I really developed strong critical thinking skills until I got to AP Lang and Comp. That class teaches you most of that and once you get to AP Literature and Composition it'll teach you almost everything else (read: the ability to find symbols, motifs, themes, "author's intent", everything you need to find in literature, etc.). And between those two classes you learn to formulate and structure strong essays. Trust me, AP classes aren't as scary as people make them seem. All my AP teachers in high school paid better attention to their students and gave helpful feedback when you asked them. They are a little more individually driven (as in the teacher won't be poking you left and right to get work done, like a college environment) and if you try really hard there shouldn't be any reason for you not to succeed.

To prepare yourself: Just go in with a mindset that is eager to learn and don't be afraid to ask questions.

[onlyaworkingtitle]

Learning how to pick apart literature and write decent essays is learned with time -- most Armadillos aren't born knowing it. Spelling and grammar are learned through practice and attention to detail. As a high school student, you're really just beginning to develop in these areas; work at it, and you'll be as good as any of us.

In the end, what it comes down to isn't how good you are at the subject, but how much the subject interests you and how much you enjoy it -- and how much time you're willing to devote to it, of course.

I don't know many websites or books to help with it, but you might like to check out theyuniversity.tumblr.com -- it's a grammar/vocab blog aimed at helping high schoolers with SATs, and presents the information in fun and humorous ways.

Also, why don't you make an account? You're far from the first pre-college visitor to the forum, and probably won't be the last. It's hard for me, at least, to take the guests seriously -- they always seem to post a new thread with a question, then wander off (seemingly before we even answer). It can be a mite frustrating. In any case, you're more than welcome to join us in a more involved way.

[Dodger Thirteen]

Shockingly enough, picking apart literature is a skill, not an inherent trait. I realized this in my American literature course last semester, when I was actually able to contribute to the conversations at hand.

You'll never be able to read everything - and believe me, I've tried - but if you keep reading and ask yourself questions about what it is that's being presented to you, you would be able to succeed. Try to find themes, ask yourself "why did the author do this?" and if you're really ambitious, look up some scholarship on some of your favourite classics.

Don't beat yourself up about it. We were all where you are at some point, even though we might not like to admit it.


As for papers...TALK TO YOUR TEACHER. I'm serious. That's what they're there for. And if they aren't willing to help you...well, one, they suck, and two, you'll have to find someone else. Hell, I'm sure someone here would be willing to take a look at some of your papers. You're still learning, and that's a good thing. Push yourself, but know that it can be a gradual process.